Browsing through stores like T.J. Maxx, I look at price tags and feel dizzy. I'm surrounded by bargains! Look, this one on this shirt says, "OUR PRICE: $19.99. COMPARE TO: $39.99." And these jeans say, "OUR PRICE $34.00 COMPARE TO $49.99!" Wow, this is great! I need to snap up these great prices now! Everything is, like, seriously discounted!
Wait a minute.
Everything is, like, compared to a price double the amount. Any price looks good when compared to a bigger one. What a gyp. Then again, I could apply the same principles to my eating habits. Suddenly I come out looking a lot better. Suddenly I wonder why those extra 25 pounds aren't simply melting away. Anything looks good when you compare it to something worse.
OUR BREAKFAST:
Two chocolate graham crackers and a cup of 2% milk.
COMPARE TO:
Three chocolate-chip cookies and a cup of whole milk.
OUR LUNCH:
An entire piece of leftover sausage pizza (instead of the half I originally got), salad with Italian dressing, and water.
COMPARE TO:
TWO pieces of pizza, NO salad, and soda. A whole glass of it.
OUR SNACK:
M&Ms and milk
COMPARE TO:
Um, MORE M&Ms and milk
OUR SUPPER:
Two hefty servings of homemade beef stew, six gumball-sized rolls
COMPARE TO:
Two hefty servings of CANNED beef stew, six BIG rolls. Or maybe seven rolls.
OUR COFFEE BREAK:
A chai latte and an entire package of chocolate-covered toffees, even though I'd promised the kids I'd bring some home for them so I had to buy another package.
COMPARE TO:
Actually, that's pretty bad. Time to bring out the big guns:
Lent is coming. I'm eating sweets while I can.
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1 comment:
This is hilarious! It really is just how you look at it, right? That will make my snacking a little easier this afternoon.
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